You see, American films abroad can do two things: 1. They serve as pieces of nostalgia from the memories back home 2. They allow you to get a slightly different perspective on them.
Now, i've found that it's fairly easy to express yourself in journal entries (or blog posts like these); but I never considered the amount of impact that words can have.
Think about the last thing you said to the person who you love most. Did you weigh your words carefully? Did you analyze how the sentence structure was going to sound? Did you consider how much your inflection impacted the meaning of that sentence? Probably not. Most people don't. But our words seem to be the one thing that can preserve ourselves: "The powerful play goes on, and you get to contribute a verse. What will your verse be?"
So here's moments, experiences, emotions, and all that other shit in words. Words ordered specifically and meaningfully (as much as I can get) to fit the right moment. Read, peruse, think or slander them. They're out here to be heard, and hopefully, show a little something.
What you thought
That it'd be hard (it is)
That running back would change things (the outcome)
That you were afraid (could you do it?)
That you'd cry everyday
That you wouldn't be missed
That Seymour was impossible
That a musical in 24 hours couldn't be done (you were wrong)
That you were trying to prove something to everyone else
That it would be life changing (it is, everyday)
That you convince her that Kake was a the best idea
That she didn't actually like you (she does)
That she wouldn't miss you (she does)
That it'd be a bigger culture shock
That travelling wasn't who you were (Fuck dat shit)
That you wouldn't figure out military time
That it'd still be unsettling
That the Scots were all bruts (Jury's out on that one)
That it wouldn't feel as good as it does
Like Clouds Resting
Like clouds resting on foreign mountaintops
I seem to hover above this thing,
this time,
The extreme "out-of-body" experience
And it's you I keep coming back to
like Turbulence that won't go away
But the good kind.
That kind that makes your stomach go into your throat
Flying
Your Smile.
I've got to get grounded
What It is
Sitting in the Airport, waiting to board a flight
She holds his seat with her coat
He gets her a coffee
-forgets how she takes it, goes back 3 times to get it right
He carries her coat, toates her suitcase
She carries nothing
Standing in line, waiting to have your passport checked
He cries, because she won't play with him
She is organizing their travel documents, stops to pretend to eat his fingers
-She can't bear to hear him whimper when she puts him down
She picks him up; he's still hers before any girls steals his heart
For now; she'll take what she can get
Boarding the plane, smiling at the flight attendent
He has talked security into allowing him to escort her to the plane
-She is crying
They stop 3 times, to kiss and hug; like it's their last time (maybe it is)
He whispers words of affection, encouragement
His hand is the last she feels as she ascends the stairs to the plane
Sitting in a chair, hovering above the Alps
Daydreaming about you
Thinking about how crazy I am; how many days since i've talked to you?
Thinking I wasn't prepared for you (for what you could be)
Remembering your eyes, the smell of your hair (and how it lingered)
-the feeling of you breathing as I lay there next to you
It's capable of all these things
And yet;
Why can't we describe it except with moments like these?
I guess, and i'm no expert
It is, what it is.
Hopefully those work on some level.
Here's the breakdown:
-Drunk Disney is the greatest idea anyone has ever had.
-Getting video messages while abroad really makes you miss home. And R. Kelly covers make that feeling soooo much better.
-Italy is the greatest, especially on bikes and bookended with gelato
-Parma Pizza; try it
-A solid friendship can withstand any amount of time that has passed
-Things do look better from above; I understand that now
-Good advice comes from many different places: you just have to know where to listen and when
-Home has changed meaning for me now; i'm still trying to decide if that's a good thing or not.
-Comfort is a beautiful thing
-Sometimes you don't know you need to relax until you actually start to do so.
-Sometimes, saying that thing that won't change things permanently but will temporarily do so, is enough
-Happiness is made from those people who choose to see it everyday, and not by those who think it's something the universe grants.
Until later,
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