Here's a story with a moral.
A girl was a sophomore is college. She went out one night with some friends and met a guy who was exactly the type she had dated her whole life. He talked a smooth game, had his confidence, and was easy-going when it came to meeting new people. They talked for awhile, and that night, exchanged numbers. They started texting back and forth (I believe the young-ins call this 'talking' nowadays); they were always very flirtatious, but never took it any step forward. He always talked about how he wasn't any good at relationships, and wasn't looking for anything serious, but thought she was awesome. She immediately got the idea that she could change him (this is one of those classic stories).
A few months later, this name-less girl was introduced to a guy who was a mutual friend of a friend. She was at a casual dinner, and thought nothing special of this guy. He was somewhat outgoing, and nice enough. After a few unplanned encounters, they exchanged numbers, and he did his best to be a stand-up guy. He had fallen into the friend-zone in the past, and worked his hardest to ensure that didn't happen again. The girl saw this effort, and it was intriguing. She found him interesting. He wanted to get to know her better, and wanted to see where it would go. Then he learned of Guy #1, and Guy #1 learned of Guy #2. There was a struggle for affection from this girl. Guy #1 thought he was a shoe-in. Guy #2 thought he was going to fall victim to the same old story. The Girl was torn, because Guy #1 was familiar, and Guy #2 was interesting. So which would she pick?
So she left it up to them. She told both Guys that if they really liked her, and wanted to be with her, then they would have to prove in ten words or less. Guy #1 knew exactly what he would say. The next day both guys went to the Girl's dorm, both ready to prove they were the right guy for her. She opened the door and Guy #1 said "I love you". The Girl was stunned, and she didn't know how to respond. Guy #1 thought he had won the battle for her affections. She turned to Guy #2 and looked at him to state his case. Guy #2 leaned in, and kissed the girl as passionately as he could, then stepped back. And The Girl chose Guy #2.
The Moral: Actions speak louder than words. Don't use 3 words when none will do.
Keep it Simple, Stupid. KISS. Boom Chyeah.
Until later,
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
A few words of wisdom
Some people are so incredibly intelligent; and because of that I post this. Men, take notice and follow through. Remember that time you didn't make the first move, well fuck it. Do it next time.
Thanks to this guy; note: I did not write this. Someone way smarter did.
One of the biggest problems college guys face with women is being put in the “Friend Zone.” I can tell you from experience that being in the zone is terrible for your confidence and feels downright miserable. There’s nothing worse than having the girl you are in love with rejecting you on a daily basis and seeing her with other men.
Once you’re in the friend zone it’s difficult to get out, but not impossible. Getting out requires using jealousy plot lines intertwined with non-neediness and well timed teases. I teach this to my more more advanced students. For everyone else, this article is about NOT getting put into the friend zone.
So you know to stay out of the friend zone…but how? There are two characteristics which differentiate friends from winners - TEASING and TAKING RISKS
TEASING
Let’s talk about teasing. If you’ve read any of my blogs or my book you’ll know that teasing is key to building sexual tension. You need sexual tension to get a girl attracted to you. So let me ask you…why do you think some guys get put in the friend zone? I’ll tell you, the guys failed to establish sexual tension.
Look at it this way - conversations that DO NOT have sexual tension are exactly like your normal conversations between friends, colleagues, and acquaintances. Why SHOULDN’T you be in the friend zone if your conversations with the girl are just like everyone elses??? You need to differentiate yourself from everyone else. You need to be the one that brings the sexual tension into the interaction. Continue to tease and you will reduce your chances of being put in the friends zone.
RISK TAKING
Generally speaking…who’s supposed to make the first move? MEN of course. Both women and men understand that the man is supposed to initiate any major relationship escalation. The first kiss, the first time having sex, the marriage proposal, they are all supposed to be initiated by the man. So how does this relate to the friend zone?
One of the hardest steps to take in an interaction is the first kiss. Most guys look for the PERFECT time for a first kiss. Everything has to line up perfectly. But when you’re thinking about taking that step you’re scared of rejection..your adrenaline is rushing…your mind is running at a thousand miles an hour…you think that if you fail things are going to get awkward..etc..etc…Fear takes over and you freeze. You don’t go for the kiss. You think to yourself that next time will be different.
You’d be surprised how many times a guy gets placed in the friend zone because he fails to act. If you don’t kiss the girl she’s going to think that you DON’T LIKE HER and she’s going to move on to the next guy. She’ll put you on the back burner thinking you just want to be friends with her and continue her search for Mr. Right.
You need to get over yourself and be willing to take a risk. Don’t wait for the perfect moment to kiss her. Create the moment. Take any opportunity you have - even if you’re only alone with her for a minute or two.
I’d much rather be the guy who risked the kiss and failed than be the guy who wonders what would have happened if I tried.
Good right? Amen to you, sir. I'm making the first move.
Thanks to this guy; note: I did not write this. Someone way smarter did.
One of the biggest problems college guys face with women is being put in the “Friend Zone.” I can tell you from experience that being in the zone is terrible for your confidence and feels downright miserable. There’s nothing worse than having the girl you are in love with rejecting you on a daily basis and seeing her with other men.
Once you’re in the friend zone it’s difficult to get out, but not impossible. Getting out requires using jealousy plot lines intertwined with non-neediness and well timed teases. I teach this to my more more advanced students. For everyone else, this article is about NOT getting put into the friend zone.
So you know to stay out of the friend zone…but how? There are two characteristics which differentiate friends from winners - TEASING and TAKING RISKS
TEASING
Let’s talk about teasing. If you’ve read any of my blogs or my book you’ll know that teasing is key to building sexual tension. You need sexual tension to get a girl attracted to you. So let me ask you…why do you think some guys get put in the friend zone? I’ll tell you, the guys failed to establish sexual tension.
Look at it this way - conversations that DO NOT have sexual tension are exactly like your normal conversations between friends, colleagues, and acquaintances. Why SHOULDN’T you be in the friend zone if your conversations with the girl are just like everyone elses??? You need to differentiate yourself from everyone else. You need to be the one that brings the sexual tension into the interaction. Continue to tease and you will reduce your chances of being put in the friends zone.
RISK TAKING
Generally speaking…who’s supposed to make the first move? MEN of course. Both women and men understand that the man is supposed to initiate any major relationship escalation. The first kiss, the first time having sex, the marriage proposal, they are all supposed to be initiated by the man. So how does this relate to the friend zone?
One of the hardest steps to take in an interaction is the first kiss. Most guys look for the PERFECT time for a first kiss. Everything has to line up perfectly. But when you’re thinking about taking that step you’re scared of rejection..your adrenaline is rushing…your mind is running at a thousand miles an hour…you think that if you fail things are going to get awkward..etc..etc…Fear takes over and you freeze. You don’t go for the kiss. You think to yourself that next time will be different.
You’d be surprised how many times a guy gets placed in the friend zone because he fails to act. If you don’t kiss the girl she’s going to think that you DON’T LIKE HER and she’s going to move on to the next guy. She’ll put you on the back burner thinking you just want to be friends with her and continue her search for Mr. Right.
You need to get over yourself and be willing to take a risk. Don’t wait for the perfect moment to kiss her. Create the moment. Take any opportunity you have - even if you’re only alone with her for a minute or two.
I’d much rather be the guy who risked the kiss and failed than be the guy who wonders what would have happened if I tried.
Good right? Amen to you, sir. I'm making the first move.
IT WON'T
Direct Quote: "You meet the girl of your dreams, and want to say hi. But being the timid geek that you are, you go home and long for the day when your paths will cross again. IT WON'T. Life isn't a rehearsal. Do something for yourself, jackass".
I found it hilarious that I named this blog (is there a better word for blog? Because I hate that word) 'Rehearsing Life'. It actually makes me feel pretty foolish.
I started writing this to learn how to live life. To talk through it. To realize life's full potential, because, as I said, the goal is always learning from experience. And yet, by this quote's standards, I am not living life. I have to stop rehearsing for it. The show has started.
Now, the first part has not happened yet. Although maybe it has, and maybe one of the many girls i've gone home and wished I had said something to them about how beautiful they looked or how sweet they were was the one for me. But then again, maybe I haven't met her yet (hey, screw you, Michael Buble). "Do something for yourself, jackass". God that speaks to me.
But they're right. Life won't wait for me. It won't let me rehearse anymore, i've got to do the show now. I need to step on the stage and give them what i've got. Isn't that profound.
Maybe the ones i've met are more incredible than i'm giving them credit for. I really hope that's the case. Don't stop for me life, i'll catch up.
Until later,
I found it hilarious that I named this blog (is there a better word for blog? Because I hate that word) 'Rehearsing Life'. It actually makes me feel pretty foolish.
I started writing this to learn how to live life. To talk through it. To realize life's full potential, because, as I said, the goal is always learning from experience. And yet, by this quote's standards, I am not living life. I have to stop rehearsing for it. The show has started.
Now, the first part has not happened yet. Although maybe it has, and maybe one of the many girls i've gone home and wished I had said something to them about how beautiful they looked or how sweet they were was the one for me. But then again, maybe I haven't met her yet (hey, screw you, Michael Buble). "Do something for yourself, jackass". God that speaks to me.
But they're right. Life won't wait for me. It won't let me rehearse anymore, i've got to do the show now. I need to step on the stage and give them what i've got. Isn't that profound.
Maybe the ones i've met are more incredible than i'm giving them credit for. I really hope that's the case. Don't stop for me life, i'll catch up.
Until later,
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